maurizio farhad, my new boyfriend. damn!

this weekend was really great. i love sally. i wish she would move here after she's done with drug school. she introduced me to 'kept', the best, most hilarious reality show ever created. my favorite of the things that the men had to do to become jerry hall's "kept man" (?!?!) was definitely the hypnosis. i can't remember the last time i laughed that hard. the last four guys left got hypnotized in front of jerry hall and her rich friends whose entire job was just to laugh their asses off at them. the guys were directed at one point to believe that their chairs were ladies that they were sexing up. it was the best thing EVER because as they all started doing their respective chairs, you could *really* see how they would sex up someone for real. it was so hilarious. the cool, smart, hip, black guy was *hardcore* humping his chair and knocked it over and continued to hump the hell out of it on the floor. meanwhile, the REALLY excruciatingly hot, Persian, semi-OCD, reserved MAURIZIO just sort of busted a slow jam on his chair. all four of their respective humping styles were perfect reflections of their personalities. it was hilarious. sara and i watched the chair-humping at least three times. this is what someone online said about 'kept' and is why it is the best show ever:

"I loved Maurizio. Beautiful guy and I considered him more conscientious rather than OCD.
He blew his chances when he didn't hump his chair during hypnosis.
I think Maurizio acted the most natural during his date with Jerry."

hahahahahah. "he blew his chances when he didn't hump his chair!" god. best reality date show ever.

and seriously, what other show has dudes having a ridiculous dance-off in 19th century costumes and a contestant who remarks of the room with the bed of nails he has to lay on as "smelling like HOT NUTS and BATT DROPPINGS"? hahahahah. oh my god.

also, on the way to folly beach, i got really excited about a song that came on the radio and was like "man, i love BLATH!" i meant to say black sabbath. haha. the song was 'war pigs' which rules.